I have had a battling few years now with my depression and my work life ect..
All things are so inter-twined; the balance has to some how not tip too far in any direction, which is not easy for me to hold together.
When i’m working I totally immense myself into my work which puts all other things in my life on the shelf so family and friends get shut out and I convince myself its for the better as finishing my work is beneficial to them as it pays the bill and also makes me who I am, but actually I know that’s not true its an excuse for not being able to balance my life in any real way. I seem to only be able to focus on the thing I feel is important at that time and I really do need to finish my work as its been around 4 years now and until its out no one is going to understand it so needs must!
It’s not easy balancing life, as I don’t have a regular anything my job is like an inventor rather than a worker, my family life hectic and unpredictable (possibly like everyone’s else’s)
I just “don’t” cope well with it’s stresses and the chocolate & drink are supposed to chill me out but i’m not sure that’s the effect I end up with as everything is done to excess.
So work has been my focus these last few years and more so this last year as I feel like i’m coming to the completion of this mammoth 6 albums story.
In a way its pulled me through and kept me focused on a reason to keep going as without this being completed I feel I would leave a very big gap in my plans for family and friends.
I do feel much better now than I did at the beginning/middle of my depression although I would not say I was fixed i’m more like a broken glass that’s been super glued back together.
Well at lest i’m still usable and that’s the point really at least I have a use still.
So I though I would blog this out as if any of you followed the deeper blogs that were on MySpace at least you will know as difficult as things have been and still are i’m defiantly on the right track back to a type of normality.
Realease day of the albums will soon arrive… but then what next maybe redo these for iTunes LP